Tuesday, 25 July 2017

The Malignant Narcissist As Character Assassin

If you have been targeted by a malignant narcissist for serious abuse, be aware that the abuse includes character assassination – the annihilation of who you are as a person. Just as through murder a careful criminal leaves no witnesses, a malignant narcissist is careful to abuse on the sly and destroy the victim’s credibility in advance in order to “leave no witnesses.” Character assassination is the premeditated murder of the target’s image, their good name, their reputation and ultimately their life.   

It takes extreme treachery to replace an authentic self with a false image of that person, and who is better skilled to do that than a sneaky malignant narcissist. Take a look at their lives; who they appear to be and who they really are. They don’t connect with reality. They live in a fictitious world of smoke and mirrors where appearances are all that matter. Narcissists only identify with their false image and they expect you to identify with the false image they invent of you. They NEED you to appear to the world the way they NEED you to be. It's your life according to the narcissist's script.
Narcissists try to make you be what they say you are because, like a psychopath, they view you as an object, not as a human person with perceptions and a mind of your own. They view you as an extension of themselves (like a tool) to control. It is the moral equivalent of control a rapist thinks he has over the body of another, whom he views as but an object, and extension of himself, an executioner of his will. Psychologists call this bizarre behavior “projective identification,” a defense mechanism. The narcissist wants you to identify with the image he projects on you. You are a mirror to reflect his fantasy, so he pressures you to behave as though it is real.
Kathy Krajco “What Makes Narcissists Tick”
Okay… So there’s that. We are nothing but objects that the malignant narcissist feels entitled to use, abuse and exploit as they please. MNs use manipulation and control tactics such as lies, slander, projection, blame-shifting, victim playing, and triangulation etc. to create a false image of their target which is always about garnering attention for themselves in the form of sympathy and positive regard while reducing and degrading their victim into oblivion. AND, they have motive. They are very invested in the way the target behaves because they have something at stake: the life of a malignant narcissist is a crime in progress, and as a result, they are continually engaged in a cover-up.

The key word here is “behaves.” Malignant narcissists don’t care what the target thinks or how they feel or who they really are. ALL people are just objects to the narcissist. The malignant narcissist only cares what the target thinks and feels insofar as it affects their behavior. And they will do whatever it takes to pressure the target into behaving according to their script. This makes malignant narcissists long-term plotters and provocateurs. MNs are unrelenting in their use of malicious provocations to get their victim to re-“act” in a way that supports their twisted narrative. “See? What did I tell ya about her outbursts?! I told ya she’s unstable!”

The victim is merely reacting to abuse. Being targeted by a malignant narcissist is a real life combat situation and victims of character assassination respond appropriately given the constant threats, the terror, the mounting pressure and the injustices. The malignant narcissist has waged war on the target. The malignant narcissist is maliciously interfering in the target’s life and relationships. The malignant narcissist is hell-bent on getting rid of the target by any means possible, no matter how outrageous, cruel, nasty, or heartless. The malignant narcissist is essentially cornering her prey, so that the prey will growl back and the malignant narcissist can play the “worried” and “concerned” victim.

The narcissist must always finger point and make a show of worry and concern, no matter how contradictory, because she’s a big spoiled baby who needs lots of attention. Plus she can use fake concern, a putrid form a slander, to stick labels on her victim. This type of premeditated tattletale shit starts early for the malignant narcissist; that’s why they are so skilled at it. They are the brother or sister from hell who always got their siblings into trouble for the crimes they committed. They are original bad seed. Of course the ignorant and the na├»ve, fellow bullies and the copycat abusers who enjoy a juicy 'tale' don’t want to hear what’s really going on behind the curtain. These idiots prefer to suspend their disbelief and play pretend with the narcissist and even participate in her scripted reality show by letting the narcissist stick her hand up their asses and puppeteer their every move. What these fools, thugs, imbeciles need to be schooled in is this:

The malignant narcissist has the mentality of a rapist – the plan is to violate and dirty-up the victim so the narcissist can pretend that they are virtuous and clean. And like a physical rapist who attacks in the dark when there are no witnesses; the malignant narcissist carries-out violent psychological attacks on the sly. The target, being the victim of the crimes, is an expert witness of the narcissist’s criminal behavior. And the narcissist perpetrator’s greatest fear is a credible witness = exposure. So, just as a rapist may use control tactics such as choking and muzzling and threatening the victim with a deadly weapon to stop her from crying out for help; the narcissist abuser does the same. The malignant narcissist is a sniper who uses her assault weapon mouth to covertly tear down and silence the target by destroying her credibility in advance.

Keep in mind that malignant narcissists will never go on the defensive – that would be beneath such a superior being. So, in order to maintain their delusions of invincibility and their offensive posture, the narcissist must force their victim into a defensive position. Any whiff of the target speaking out about their abuses drives them to make a preemptive strike to throw the victim on the defensive. The premeditated and opportunistic exploitation of people, sometimes within the legal system, to maliciously smear and damage the character/identity of the target while silencing her voice, via monitoring, intimidation, threats and other forms of psychological abuse is an example of the rock bottom the malignant narcissist will sink to in order to maintain control over her victim.  Remember: malignant narcissists are predatory and predators stalks and attack their prey first. These freaks are covert aggressives that must always remain in the dominant position. No matter what. That means getting rid of the whistleblower so they can get their way. 

Character assassination is the narcissist’s method of taking a hit out on the target – it’s social murder and apparently it’s legal. The idea is to reduce the target to such a lowly position that it prevents the target from reporting the narcissist's crimes to the authorities. Stops the target from being taken seriously by the authorities. Stops the target from taking the stand and testifying. The target is the most credible character witness of the vile malignant narcissist and they know it, so they retaliate with a vengeance aggressively vandalizing the target’s image. Character assassination is punishment for unmasking the malignant narcissist and breaking the "no talk" rule. It’s about condemning the target to a life in prison for the crimes the narcissist commits. Character assassination is about scapegoating and projecting onto the target, so the target ends-up with the reputation and the life the malignant narcissist deserves. Character assassination is about DESTROYING the evidence; the trustworthiness of their most damning witness.

Ignominy is terrible, a fate worse than death. But at least if a person deserves his bad name, his sense of justice isn’t outraged on top of it all. If you’ve ever been accused of something you didn’t do, then you know what I mean: it goes right through you.
Imagine the situation: there’s an ugly false image of you out there that the whole world thinks is you. They relate to it as you. The world treats you like you are that. So, it might as well BE you. If that isn’t a descent into hell, I can’t imagine what is. It’s intolerable.
The precious image that you have of yourself is under unrelenting attack from all sides. In effect, the whole world is gaslighting you. You have a problem very similar to a narcissist’s, except that your false image sucks and you don’t want it to replace your true self. So you cling to it for dear life. It’s you against the world. Six billion people say that is you, and you alone say the person you know inside is you. Something’s gotta give.
His fate is intolerable because the one who stole his reputation is also the one the bad reputation belongs to: that just cannot be accepted.
It cannot be forgiven either not without restitution of what was stolen = his good name. The crime is in progress until he gets it back, because every day he suffers additional damages.
 “What Makes Narcissists Tick” page 244.
If going no contact is akin to placing yourself in the witness protection program, then what I’ve experienced is like being framed for a crime I didn’t commit, going to prison, breaking out and being hunted with a target on my back. The malignant narcissists will stop at nothing to make their target (me) take the fall. Just as a criminal doesn’t want to do hard time, the malignant narcissist doesn’t want to face the hardcore reality of who they are. As a result, the fugitive of a MN cult is subjected to the same threat as any defector who escapes with a suitcase full of sensitive inside information that could bring down the regime.  

Character assassination, smear campaigns, scapegoating and vandalizing the target’s image are tactics used by the malignant narcissist to avoid public shame of the truth. The malignant narcissist is terrified of having their freedom taken away – their freedom to abuse and exploit others whenever the hell they want. They are complete frauds and they are absolutely terrified of exposure.

Why are they so scared? Because malignant narcissists are rotten to the core; that’s their deep, dark secret. And if their dirty little secret was revealed, they would be abandoned for being such deviants. And as much as narcissists hate humanity; they desperately need and rely on humanity to abuse, exploit, manipulate, con, control, disempower and scapegoat so that they can feel superior. And feeling superior is the name of the game. If they were forced to acknowledge their debts and dependencies on others (even if their debts and dependencies are through maltreatment) they would no longer appear superior. The malignant narcissist would be completely humiliated if others knew their limitations – that in order to feel good and appear good, they must make others feel bad and look bad.  That’s a pretty pathetic existence. Not only that, they would likely be punished for exploiting others opportunistically. So, malignant narcissists cover their tracks, by becoming cunning and devious, concealing their true motives and actions as much as possible. This is where character assassination comes in because there is always at least one discerning individual who can see that the emperor is wearing no clothes!

When the net is closing in on the narcissist and there is a very real threat of being outwitted or exposed, the narcissist relies on their ability to project a synthetic image more than ever. At this stage, narcissists become completely deceptive and extremely treacherous in an attempt to sustain whatever dishonesty they are guilty of while not appearing to be dishonest.

If you have been on the receiving end of a malignant narcissist post-abuse cover-up/character assassination then you know this can create terrifyingly bizarre scenes that make you wonder if you are living a nightmare.  In fact, things can become so strange and surreal that if you were to try and explain what the narcissist just pulled-off, people would think you are tripping on psychedelic drugs. This is where I have to hand it to those crazy evil fucks; they create scenarios that are so inexplicable their victims are left tongue-tied. Malignant Narcissists will do whatever, and I mean whatever it takes to cover their tracks - including, inflicting MORE abuse onto the victim. In fact, the narcissist's post-abuse cover-up is always more destructive than the original crime. 

Character assassination assails with asymmetrical attacks that deny the target any chance to defend himself. In other words, it’s moral mayhem because the victim is disabled somehow and therefore unable to defend himself.
Mayhem is the crime that denies people the most basic human right – the right to a defense. The character assassin pulls this off by attacking so as to have his unanswered say. The victim knows he’s being destroyed but can do nothing about it because he is being prevented from confronting his accuser.
Character assassins get their unanswered say by accusing you behind your back. If you try to defend yourself by going to people and raising the subject, you risk spreading lies about yourself. It’s a Catch-22. In fact people will get mad at you for trying to talk about it. They will do whatever it takes to alienate you so you stay away. They will act like YOU are the vicious character assassin, condemning anything you do to try and defend yourself. It’s a Catch-22. Thus they revictimize you by denying you any chance to defend yourself.
“What Makes Narcissists Tick” page 246-247.

Who would believe a “sister” and “mother” would call the police and accuse their victim of doing to them the exact thing they are in the process of doing to her? Who would believe a sister would lie to police and state her innocent sister is “psychotic” and “dangerous” just to avoid the embarrassment of being outed a cyberstalker? Who would believe a sister would lie outrageously to authorities and destroy her innocent sister's reputation just to punish her for breaking the "NO TALK" rule of the MN asylum? Who would believe that protesting the malignant narcissist’s viciousness, abuse and lies would drive the malignant narcissist cult to even more extreme acts of brutality to disempower and silence the victim? For example, the MN gains access to her sister’s bank account and cleans it out so she has no money and is forced to endure severe financial stress, and that’s piled onto the stress of her trying to obtain employment with a massive road block the malignant narcissist intentionally laid with her calculated slander; slander that was also spread to the victim’s neighbors that resulted in the victim’s home environment being unsafe which forced her to have to pack-up and move. That’s an example of how malignant narcissists use the weight of mounting pressure to try and break the victim’s back. It’s called mental cruelty and the intentional infliction of emotional distress and it's designed to kill, or, at the very least, render the victim neutralized and too mentally and physically weak to fight back. 

The severity of the malignant narcissist’s crime is of no significance to the MN. Whether they get caught lying to police or snooping through your sock drawer, the gaslighting and cruelties they inflict to try and silence the witness never match the crimes they are in the process of covering-up. In the malignant narcissist’s eyes, the victim is expendable. For example, the malignant narcissist mother doesn’t give a damn if she destroys her daughter’s life to the point where she ends up destitute and living on the streets, just as long as people never “believe” what the daughter says about her being a bad mother. See what I’m saying? Their maliciousness reaches delusional proportions as they become obsessed with protecting their false image and ruining the victim so they can remain superior and triumphant. It's very important for the malignant narcissist to WIN at all costs.    
Character assassination destroys careers, marriages, and relationships, isolating the victim “to the desert” of humankind. Except for the fortunate who have independent means, it’s usually a trip down Skid Row, with one ramification after another barring every way out and relentlessly crushing and hammering the victim into ---- guess what? Exactly what their assassin says they are. This is where rag pickers and bag ladies and suicides come from. The victim will ask why he bothered to be a good person when what a person is isn’t up to him --- when it’s up to whatever others choose to make of him.
“What Makes Narcissists Tick” page 246.
The malignant narcissist degrades and humiliates others, trashes good names, tarnishes virtues, maligns strong character and ruins reputations because there is a huge pay off for them - getting their way and getting away with it. They will stop at nothing to obstruct the whistleblower from outing their morally repugnant, debauched, and parasitic existence. 

Bottom Line:  If you cannot drop off the grid, go into the no contact witness protection program or lay low then the malignant narcissist better fear you, or you better have some kind of power. Because if you decide to fight back, clear your name and expose the narcissist cult then you can expect unyielding pushback and merciless attacks and invasions from all sides: finances, career, livelihood, home environment, relationships, reputation, privacy, freedoms and rights. Malignant narcissists want the kind of power over others that we humans have over cattle. They want to capture us, brand us and hold us captive while they feed on our pain. Their sadism is unrelenting and it often ends in marginalizing and stigmatizing the victim for life. That is, if the victim makes it. When the world piles on with their abusers, it often breaks the victim’s back and permanent damage is done.   

For those of you who aren’t convinced of the malignant narcissist’s wrath when it comes to loss of control over their target and consequently their false image; you might want to ask the question “How exactly did Kathy Krajco die?”

Kathy Krajco, ACON blogger and author of “What Makes Narcissists Tick” (blog and book) wrote under her real name, and she wrote extensively about her abusive malignant narcissist father and sister. Kathy’s mother died in 1992, and her father died in 2004. So by the time she was blogging about malignant narcissism both her parents had passed away.

According to Kathy’s blog her sister Terese was gainfully employed as a teacher, but lived at home with her parents her entire life. From what I gather, she mooched off her parents while hoarding her own money and even ended up manipulating the MN father into disinheriting Kathy. Kathy was also a teacher and I suspect she was a target of a career smear campaign orchestrated by Terese. Throughout Kathy’s blog and book there are numerous accounts of Terese’s bullying and abuse. For example, Kathy had a heart condition and one day Terese, who lived across the street, hired a snow plow guy to block Kathy’s driveway with snow. This meant that Kathy would have to go out and shovel in order to get her car out of the driveway. It would appear that Terese wanted to induce a heart attack in Kathy. Only a malignant narcissist could dream-up a scheme like that.

Kathy died unexpectedly in her home on May 9, 2008. She was 56 years old. Her sister Terese was the one who discovered her body. After Kathy died, her blog started being mysteriously dismantled. The only way that could happen is if someone had access to it. I know from experience, that I can leave my blog sitting around dormant for months without it being tampered.

When I read online that Kathy had died, I cried. It was a huge loss to the ACON blogging community. And for years it bothered me that this brave woman who championed for the victims of narcissistic abuse was taken from this world, while an evil malignant narcissist (her sister) lived on.

Anna V of Narcissists Suck blog ordered Kathy’s death certificate to find out the Cause of Death. There didn’t appear to be anything suspicious in the report. Apparently Kathy died of natural causes – her heart may have given out.

Despite this information, there had always been a part of me that was left speculating whether or not Kathy’s sister played a hand in her death. Perhaps it’s because through experience I have become painfully that a malignant narcissist is capable of doing almost anything to the person who breaks the “no talk” rule. I have witnessed how out of control a malignant narcissist can become when they lose even an inch of control over their target and their precious image.

A couple of months ago my curiosity got the better of me and I read Kathy’s online obituary and Googled her sister’s name. What I discovered is this: Terese Krajco retired from teaching in 2012, and died in her home 5 years to the day that her sister Kathy died. I find it significant that Terese Krajco died on the anniversary of Kathy’s death.

Unlike Kathy’s obit that stated she died “unexpectedly,” Terese Krajco’s obit simply said she died alone at home on May 9, 2013 at the age of 59.

Is the date of Terese Krajco’s death a coincidence or an indication of a disturbed personality carrying out a ritualistic act to steal one last thing from her sister of which she was so irrationally envious? Did Terese assassinate Kathy? Did repressed guilt and shame finally surface to the conscience of a malignant narcissist and prompt her to off herself? Or, was she just fresh out of narc supply and saw no reason to carry on?

I don’t know, but I know this about character assassination:
When you destroy someone’s image, their good name, you ruin a life. In fact, you take a life. For, that person’s real life goes up in smoke. There is no worse thing you can do to a person. It would be less cruel to kill him with a gun. This is the fate worse than death, and everyone’s deepest, darkest fear.  
----- Kathy Krajco
And experience has also taught me this: Malignant narcissists want to snuff out the fight in us and win. So NEVER allow the malignant narcissist’s outrageous lies to throw you on the defensive. Instead, ALWAYS point the accusing finger back at them with the truth. They hate knowing their victim is still swinging and they hate the thought of losing. To the malignant narcissist, EXPOSURE is a fate worse than death, and their deepest, darkest fear.

This is the second edition of "Malignant Narcissist As Character Assassin." The original article was  posted on my blog in 2014 and is included in the collection of essays in my eBook and print book:

For more information on this topic read this excellent article by ACON Blogger Gail Myers The Narcissist's Smear Campaign: Gossip, Lies and Slander.

This is a fantastic article by ACON Blogger Sweet Violet on the evil of malignant narcissism The Smallness of Evil.

Wednesday, 19 July 2017

I'm a human being, god-dammit! My Life Has Value!

I don't have to tell you things are bad. Everybody knows things are bad. It's a depression. Everybody's out of work or scared of losing their job. The dollar buys a nickel's worth. Banks are going bust. Shopkeepers keep a gun under the counter. Punks are running wild in the street and there's nobody anywhere who seems to know what to do, and there's no end to it. We know the air is unfit to breathe and our food is unfit to eat, and we sit watching our TVs while some local newscaster tells us that today we had fifteen homicides and sixty-three violent crimes, as if that's the way it's supposed to be.

We know things are bad — worse than bad. They're crazy. It's like everything everywhere is going crazy, so we don't go out anymore. We sit in the house, and slowly the world we are living in is getting smaller, and all we say is: 'Please, at least leave us alone in our living rooms. Let me have my toaster and my TV and my steel-belted radials and I won't say anything. Just leave us alone.'

Well, I'm not gonna leave you alone. I want you to get MAD! I don't want you to protest. I don't want you to riot — I don't want you to write to your congressman, because I wouldn't know what to tell you to write. I don't know what to do about the depression and the inflation and the Russians and the crime in the street. All I know is that first you've got to get mad. [shouting] You've got to say: 'I'm a human being, god-dammit! My life has value!'

So, I want you to get up now. I want all of you to get up out of your chairs. I want you to get up right now and go to the window. Open it, and stick your head out, and yell: I'M AS MAD AS HELL, AND I'M NOT GOING TO TAKE THIS ANYMORE!

I want you to get up right now. Sit up. Go to your windows. Open them and stick your head out and yell - 'I'm as mad as hell and I'm not gonna take this anymore!' Things have got to change. But first, you've gotta get mad!...You've got to say, I'M AS MAD AS HELL, AND I'M NOT GOING TO TAKE THIS ANYMORE! Then we'll figure out what to do about the depression and the inflation and the oil crisis. But first, get up out of your chairs, open the window, stick your head out, and yell, and say it: I'M AS MAD AS HELL, AND I'M NOT GOING TO TAKE THIS ANYMORE!  --- Network

Thursday, 13 July 2017

Creepy Smear Campaigns

If you're a big shot [or think you are], there are many ways to deal with criticism: You can address it with counterarguments, you can use it to improve yourself, you can ignore it ... or you can spend inordinate amounts of time and/or money trying to nuke the reputation of your critics in the hopes that it will make people stop listening to them.

This is about the people who go for that last option. But sometimes they end up throwing so much shit in the wind that it flies right back in their faces. Like when ...

Church of Scientology Forged a Bomb Threat to Smear a Journalist

If you ever start feeling sorry for those poor Scientologists because everyone picks on them, just remember the time they had a journalist indicted on fake terrorism charges because she wrote a book that painted them in a bad light. If you think we're being unfair, well, let's run through the details.

Starting in 1969, journalist Paulette Cooper published a number of damning exposes on the church and its founder, sci-fi writer turned messiah L. Ron Hubbard, including a book called The Scandal of Scientology, which detailed the psychological methods used to keep the church's followers (and, more importantly, their money) in line. The church tried to sue Cooper to shut her up several times, but none of the lawsuits took off, mainly because they couldn't prove that she had just pulled her book out of her ass like they claimed.

So, they moved to the next step: "Operation Freakout," an organized campaign to have Cooper "incarcerated in a mental institution or jail, or at least to hit her so hard that she drops her attacks" (that's a direct quote from a real church document). Besides writing her phone number on bathroom walls and sending anonymous smear letters to her family members and neighbors, the Scientologists actually infiltrated Cooper's life by having agents pose as friends -- one supposed friend reported that Cooper was close to suicide after all the harassment, adding, "Wouldn't that be great for Scientology?"

But the lowest moment came when church members mailed themselves bomb threats and told the police that Cooper had sent them. Cooper agreed to have her fingerprints taken by the cops, not too worried by the laughably transparent attempt to have her arrested ... only to find out that her prints were actually on the threatening letters, and that the stationery had come from her house (courtesy of the infiltrators). This resulted in some very real federal charges for conspiracy to commit terrorism, which turned Cooper's life into a living hell until the charges were finally dismissed two years later.
Documents seized in an FBI raid of a Scientology office in 1977 revealed all of this and more: The Scientologists had also planned to frame Cooper for threatening President Ford and Henry Kissinger. Oh, and according to a former member, at one point they even planned to murder her. At which point presumably somebody stood up and said, "Whoa, we'd better not do that or else we'll look like assholes."

General Motors Laid Out Hooker Traps for Ralph Nader

After spending most of the 1930s killing the electric streetcar and conspiring to install a fascist dictatorship in America, by the 1960s General Motors had moved on to more constructive things -- like building criminally unsafe cars with total impunity. When some guy called Ralph Nader came along and ruined the party for GM, the company decided to dig up dirt on Nader to discredit him ... and when they couldn't find any shameful secrets in his past, they figured they'd help him create some. With hookers.

The higher-ups at General Motors found themselves facing a wave of scrutiny after Nader's most famous book, Unsafe at Any Speed, was published. The book is a scandalous look into the safety record of the automobile industry, and it exposed GM's 1960 Chevrolet Corvair as the murder machine that it was. Rather than take Nader's advice to heart and create cars that didn't unnecessarily kill people, GM came up with a solution that to them made a lot more sense: If they proved that Nader was a pervert or a homosexual, obviously everyone would forget about the whole "My car could kill me at any moment" thing and continue buying unsafe vehicles.

And so, GM hired private detectives to follow Nader around and catch him in some kind of unscrupulous act, only to discover that he was perfectly clean (17 detectives died of boredom during the stakeouts). Still, GM was determined to get something on the guy, even if they had to fabricate it. Nader was able to confirm, years after GM's crusade, that the company had greenlit a plan to hire comely prostitutes to throw themselves at him in the hopes that his raw animal lust would kick in and cause him to give himself over to them. Thankfully, his extreme dullness prevailed and the plan failed.

GM's plans were revealed when the taped conversations of one of the detectives with GM higher-ups became public. Eventually, the company's president was forced to apologize to Nader for the invasion of privacy. We kinda hope Nader becomes president one day just so he can harass them with an army of hookers. See if they like it.